What Story Are You Telling Yourself?

Stories shape us.  The narratives we tell ourselves about our bodies & our lives have a profound effect on our performance & our happiness.  A recent email from a student reminded me just how powerful stories can be:

"I was struggling with chronic pain which had snowballed into an identity crisis and sapped my energy and self-confidence. While I was already working with a therapist who helped get me out of my most desperate and depressed phase, there was still something holding me back from realizing my full potential. I was letting stupid shit, an achy neck or argument with my husband, trip me up and trigger old negative thought patterns. I needed help letting go of my fear and believing in myself again.

While I had the motivation and discipline to do the work necessary, I still had doubts. I’ve realized from working with you that what was holding me back was a sense of not having complete control over my situation because I lacked full ownership of the process. I had been looking outside myself for “the” thing that would fix my problems. I finally realized that the most effective program for me was the one that I would create for myself and that it should be fluid & playful. 

I was inspired by Moshe Feldenkrais, who used himself as a guinea pig and dug deep to uncover the core issue exacerbating his knee pain. His story prompted me to look more critically at my own habits and assumptions.  On one of our calls, you noted the difference between sensation and perception. Learning that my negative reaction to pain would only serve to perpetuate the pain, I started to be more conscious of my thoughts and choose to respond differently. I also reflected on my past with this newfound perspective and totally rewrote the story I was telling myself and others. By reframing myself as the hero, not the victim, I now had to play the part. With your encouragement, I went in and kicked myself in the butt because no one else could do it for me.

“Look inside yourself for the answers - you’re the only one who knows what’s best for you. Everybody else is just guessing.” Charles de Lint

The final insight, the one that really stimulated me to give it my all, came from the book “The Brain’s Way of Healing.”  In a nutshell, neuroplasticity explains WHY anything is possible if you set your mind to it. The inspiring stories in the book were all I needed to finally let go of my hope for a miracle cure or business success. Thanks to the author of the book and to you, I replaced that hope with faith in my ability to change things I previously thought were unchangeable.

I’d say that I’ve done all the work and you were my guide, my business coach and my cheerleader. You helped me use movement and awareness to figure out what things - in my body, my mind and my life - I needed to focus on. Really, it’s all about mindset and you were there to question me when I said “I can’t” or “I hope” until it finally sunk in."

Lauren showed up & did the work.  But the magic wasn't in any program I could have written for her.  It was in the way she reframed her story.  When you switch from victim to hero, object to subject, you expand what you're capable of.  And that's what it's all about.

If you're ready to shift your own story, click below to book a Breakthrough Call.  

Chandler StevensComment